My Most Memorable High



"My bestie and I, in Chicago, went to see Barbra Streisand and Kris Kristofferson in A STAR IS BORN. Mid 70's maybe? We smoked before heading to the movies. It was a bright and sunny day, we got there, paid for our tickets and entered. We opened the door to the theater and maybe it was the weed, maybe the sun, but we were both blinded by the darkness inside the theater and could not see. My bestie and I stood in the aisle, baffled, and she started laughing. Embarrassed, I attempted to sit in the first seat I could "sense". But someone was already sitting in it. Finally our eyes adjusted to the lack of light but not before people noticed us reaching and patting around for empty seats and began laughing at us. We must have looked, well, high! My bestie and I still get a good laugh over this. -- Edwina "


"I smoked before I went to work and I work as a cashier at a restaurant. As I cashed out a customer, I threw his reciept away in the garbage without even asking until he told me he needed the receipt. My dumb ass instead of printing him a new reciept, started rummaging the garbage bin full of papers and food waste and handed him his crumpled up receipt that I earlier threw. He didn't say a word and gave me a very dirty and confused look. He said he wants a new one and I simply told him I didn't know how to print a new reciept until a co-worker came and apologized and handed him his new reciept. Hahaha I've never gone to work high after that incident cus it's too embarrassing."

Insomniac Cat

"Hi, I am Insomniac Cat, from Putnam, CT. Back in the early nineties, I used to get baked quite a bit, but I remember one particular incident. Mostly when I got really fried I would get paranoid as hell. One night my friends and I were all superbaked, and we were watching a movie about Christopher Columbus. The first scene that freaked me out was when all the sailors realized that they had sailed farther west than anyone had ever done before. All the sailors were on deck on their knees praying to God, and there was a priest or someone who was leading the prayer service. They were praying for God to save their sorry asses. It totally freaked me out, like I was on the boat and we were going to sail off the edge of the effin' world! 

A little later on, they reached wherever it was they landed, and the sailors got out and went on shore. They met some Indians, and one of them stabbed a guy in the lung, and he fell into the water gasping and gurgling. That really blew my mind, I was scared shitless. After that, another guy got eaten by a shark. I got so freaked out, I got up and went into my friend's basement, and hid in a closet. It had horizontal slats in the door, and I kept looking out. I was terrified that the land sharks were going to get me. I stayed in that closet for like 2 hours, and when I finally sobered up, I went back upstairs. My friend looked at me and said, "Where the eff have you been?"I told him that I was totally freaked out and I had to leave. I needed to be alone. Friggin' land sharks man!


"I was 15 and was just starting to get into the habit of smoking cannabis a few times a week , Before that when I was 14 I gave it a try on three occasions inhaled the best I could and didn't get high. I knew it was real because my friends around me got pretty stoned smoking the same stuff. I just thought it didn't work on me. 

When I was 15 I met a friend I worked with and he got me into the habit of smoking cannabis often. So I was hanging out with my friend by a river near my house. We were smoking out of a bong. My friend ran into his other friend Jacob who was walking with his sister and his baby sister on the way to the river. We asked them to tag along and they did. We went to this secluded area with the baby (who I did not feel comfortable smoking around) and started to light up. After about 20 min into our sesh I began to feel really self aware that the baby was going to accidentally say something about us smoking weed because the baby could almost talk ,or the sister would say something. So as we are hanging in these bushes sitting on a log looking at a river I could hear someone coming through the bushes . After more rustling I saw a red shirt and this guy yells, "Don't run, guys, you're  only gonna make it worse for yourselves."
 I flip out and sprint with my friends friend and the baby. We are running through the woods and this other guys got a baby. The guy in the red yells "Don't run up there, that's where the police are." Im terrified. I sprint out of the woods anyways and there is this fat lady who was waiting for me on the outside. She said "There he is" and started to chase me. I ran back into the woods and dove into a bush which I lay in. As I was lying in the bush I heard police sirens so I decided to stay put. 90 min I lay in that bush. High as hell. I pulled out some gym clothing and used it as a pillow and dozed off. I eventually came out of the spot and went home. Turns out that fat lady was my friend's mom and there wasn't any cops or sirens. That part was in my head.


"Age prompts wisdom and memories of days past. But who would have known that one girl, one album & one hit of weed could have such positive effects? The year was1975, the day was my birthday. I was full of excitement as I opened my gift. It was the new Ziggy Stardust album. Once again, snitching a bit of weed from my older brother, I tore off across the playground, album under my arm, weed in my pocket to visit with my best friend. 

My friend at the time was diagnosed with childhood leukemia. Most all our friends were busy living life, leaving 'Sandy' mainly alone to deal with her illness. I would visit and sit with her, heartbroken and with each dose of chemo. she would become sicker and sicker. As usual Sandy's momwould enthusiastically greet me at the door. I was her break and her daughter's "lift" of life. Sandy and I listened to that album over and over, belting out every word to the songs, which today stimulates one of my most fond memories among the many memories I am fortunate to have. In unison, "Suffering City" OO HaH --(HOLD THAT HIT IN) Drum--dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun- dunt (EXHALE) SUFFERING!!! (HIGH FIVE!!!) "WHAM BAM THANK YOU MAME!!" Smiling-dancing-munching- then finally sleeping peacefully -- I would look at Sandy with such a bitter sweetness in my heart. Sandy's Mom would arrive home, hug me, rave about how my visits would so positively affect her daughter's disposition and her mental and physical health. I, on the other hand, smiling deep inside -- if only she knew --"toke on"!
Sandy's illness went into remission, she married, had a little boy, lost her husband to a fatal car accident(NO we didn't use the typical antidepressants). Unfortunately, leukemia returned. I lost Sandy---(TOKE)- 'SUFFERING CITY." Sandy's son at the age of 15 was killed in an ATV accident. They are all buried together....sad but true... However, in those moments we were lifted from the pain are quite fond!!!! and As for me, the moments in my life, that's only the beginning." Without laughter to rise above the flood of tears and pain in life, I would have drowned a long time ago. I still "get by with a little help from my 'friend!"


"My name is Sum from California. I was at a drive through with a few of my friends and ordered from Jack In the Box. Cause you know weed makes everything taste great. So after we ordered and paid for the food. I said out loud "Can I get some Marijuana Sauce?" I meant to say mayonnaise. The lady at the register and we started cracking up."


"Living on the Jersey Shore didn't provide the type of  intellectual stimulation that living in a big city provides. After a few trips to NYC to purchase a few pounds of pot, I found myself in a unique situation one April evening while visiting a dealer who called saying, "I've got something you need to see." 

In 1968 President Nixon was about to close the Mexican boarder, calling it OPERATION INTERCEPT. At the same time marijuana availability had been drying up. As I was sitting in my friend's apartment he was visited by one of his close friends who brought along a friend who was visiting from Tuscon, AZ. It just so happened that he brought along the first special lime green hand press weed (all buds, no shake) I'd ever seen. 
He had a problem. He'd bought 300 pounds and had no one to sell it to. After smoking it, I knew immediately that it was the BEST shit I'd smoked. Sweet, sticky, very little seeds and the buds would stick to the wall.This was marijuana in a large quantity that NYC had not seen in a seriously long time.I only knew two people in NYC, but we agreed on a plan and in less than 5 days I was able to connect to the largest dealers in the East Village and sold every pound. I wrote the entire story and have pictures in my first book "RIGHT UNDER YOUR NOSE, Sex, Drugs, Rock and Roll. Available on Amazon, or Rocket Science

"I lived at Masonic Home in Ft. Worth, Texas. the summer of my freshmen year. I wanted to work off campus where some friends who had just graduated were going to work and was told if I was going to work off campus I had to live off campus so I moved in with them in a garage apartment close to TWC. We would usually be walking down the driveway to the house as the sun was coming up. I would wake first and go sit in chair, reach under and pull out pan and start rolling. Soon Goose would wake up and lay on the couch and I'd throw him a joint and we would start smoking. On this one day we started and didn't say a word to each other and then looked at each other and started laughing when we noticed the sun was going down. Oh well, just kept smoking."


"It was 1972. I was living in Montreal with my boyfriend. We got completely wasted before boarding a bus to go downtown. As the bus was crowded and we couldn't get two seats together, we sat across the aisle from each other. From the corner of my eye, I could see that the person sitting in the seat next to me was clothed in a large swath of peach-colored material. I immediately knew it was one of those Hare Krishna guys you could see at the airport handing out literature. He turned to me and held up his pamphlet and, while his lips seemed to be moving normally, all I heard coming out of his mouth was "bzeeet, bzooot, bzat, bzup." I had no idea what he said, but I just said, "no, thank you." I knew I shouldn't have, because I was trying to quell the burst of laughter arising within me, but I turned to look across the aisle at my boyfriend who was staring at me with a shit-eating grin and I involuntarily threw my head back and laughed so hard that tears rolled down my cheeks. That got him started, too. And I knew that if I so much as glanced at my peach-clothed seat companion, it would only get worse. We couldn't contain ourselves at all and got thrown off the bus for causing a disturbance. We even laughed harder at that, although we willingly complied, realizing we should probably avoid confined spaces with other people. It was a great day to spend at Mount Royal Park.-- Chana Dvora, Ocean Shores, WA"


"Some friends and i were about 16-17 and it was summer time and we were smoking on the swings at local school. Some little kids came over to us and we asked them if they want to get high (we were not going to give them any, just wanted to see what they would say),  They ran away saying potters, potters. i never laughed so hard. So we started calling ourselves potters. -- tommyfnw"


"So I'm a junior in high school and I've been smoking for about 2 years on and off. Over the summer I started smoking heavy. Like everyday a couple of times a day. My parents don't know I smoke so I just use zebra pens or glass eye droppers for one hitters. They really save weed and you can just toss them after u use them. But I'll get back to one of the best highs I've had. Last week I went to the Christmas choir concert and smoked before I went in. I dropped of my friend who doesn't smoke in the parking lot and took a little 5 minute drive to smoke and went back to the school for the concert. I walk in and find my friends again and the concert starts. It was the most beautiful school concert that I had seen. I almost started to tear up LOL. It is a must do every year to go to the Christmas choir concert high as a kite. I must say you should go to one high too."


"I'm not a regular smoker but whenever I do, the first thing which triggers is my laughter. That's the biggest symptom after hunger whenever I did. So I got done with my 2nd year of college and started interning in a finance company along with 2 friends. Another friend called up and told me he was heading in that direction and could drop us off at our office. He started blazing while driving and offered me to do it. I took 5-6 drags. After we reached the office (on my first day) the weed started to do its work. I started laughing and burst out in complete laughter in front of my boss. He had no idea what had happened to me and on the other hand, my friends tried to control me. I kept laughing for like 4 hours but doing this on the first day of my job was the best experience ever!! 😄😄 Pranav Sahani, Mumbai, India. "

Lilly V

"Back in the mid 80’s, my friend Gina and I smoked a nice doobie and got the munchies so we went to Whataburger to get some food. At Whataburger, you spoke directly to a person, not a box like today. The drive thru window was up kinda high and we were in a small car so Gina had to look up at the guy who was waiting to take our order.We decided what we wanted and she turns and proceeds to give him our order. The guy then holds one hand up and cups it to his ear to let us know he didn’t hear us. Gina then repeats the order in a much louder voice. The guy then raises his other hand and is now cupping both ears.She looks at me and says “Why the hell would they put a person who is hard of hearing on the drive thru window”? And before I can answer her, she turns back around and screams the order as loud as she can. I start laughing because 1. I’m stoned, 2. she is screaming and 3. the whole thing has gotten really funny to me.The guy then lowers his hands and using only one hand this time, starts making a cranking motion. She looks at me, I look at her and then we both look at the driver side window only to realize it was closed.We became hysterical with laughter and had to drive away because we couldn’t stop laughing.To this very day, I cannot tell this story without cracking up. One of the best highs I ever had!Lilly V, Montana"

"My friends call me "Big Timmy." I'm really tall and have been since i was a kid. I excelled at sports but i was always a bit self conscious. When i was 12, in 1978, my ‘’coolest guy in town‘’ older brother invited me to go with him to a Saturday afternoon high school party. I was thrilled! My brother is 5 years older than me and i looked up to him in everyway at that time. 

At the party, bowls and joints were going around in every direction. I smoked so much that i became the life of the party. I was flirting with the girls, joking with the guys, dancing around to the music... i had the time of my life. I knew right then that weed would always be part of my life. My inhibitions dropped, i felt cool and accepted, i felt free and happy. I never laughed so much in my life. 
Over the next 4 years or i smoked maybe 5-6 times a year. It wasn't until sophmore year in high school that i bought my own and it would take another year or so, 16ish, before i started smoking nearly every day. Those were tumultuous times in our family as my father, who was in a classic, early 40's, midlife crisis, had moved us from a large city near Chicago to a small farming town in the middle of Illinois. Seperated from my older brother in an all new world at 15, for an awkward kid, was really tough. I was having trouble fitting into my new surroundings. I was a stand-out athlete, i was really tall, i talked like a city kid... all these things were part of it i guess. One day i decided i wanted to be as cool as i was that first day i got high. So the next time we went home to visit i bought a quarter pound from my brother and the rest is history. I had a wild finish to my high school day's. It all ended with me having blown all my sports and college opportunities and a enlisting in the US Navy a few months after graduation. The rebellion was complete and in October of '84 i shipped out to San Diego, California, to join my ship. I had a lot of issues in that first year in the Navy. Not the least of which was getting hooked on methamphetamine. Yep, i said it, the most powerful drug on the planet. I had never done a stimulant before and was hooked right away. The military tests your pee pee for drugs randomly, and because weed stays in the system for a month or so, a lot of people in the service choose alcohol and amphetamines. A really bad combo and it's the "elephant in the room" for the military. At the end of the unhealthiest year of my life i finally went to the ship's doctor for help. The medical staff decided to send me to a 6 week rehab on a military base in Jacksonville Florida...
Without furthet ado, i will now tell you the greatest weed story of my life. In the 5th of 6 weeks of rehab i had earned 2 hours per night of base privliges. I really felt great and was full of energy. One night the guys and i set out to take a walk and eventually ended up at the bowling alley. As we were approaching the entrance, at dusk, very low light, i noticed a big blob like thing lying on the wheelchair ramp about 30 feet ahead of us. As i headed that way a couple of the other guys noticed it too. We raced to it and i picked it up. Upon first glance i was almost positive about what it was, but in the darkness i couldn't be sure. Instinctively, i quickly shoved it down the front of my pants and ran to the bathroom inside the bowling alley. The 5 of us stood there quietly as i pulled it out. Sure enough it was a baggie with close to a half ounce of weed in it. On a military base with a huge rehab hospital on it. What are the odds? The guys had a big decision to make. I made mine in less than a second and so did my best buddy at the time, the others took 2 seconds. One guy said this has to have come straight from god. I said there is no way this isn't a sign, i'm smoking all that shit. Off to the vending machine we went for 5 of the most refreshing cans of soda i ever saw grown men drink. We picked out a dark, out of the way spot down by a big lake and over the next hour proceeded to smoke all of it. We couldn't take it home so we just burned and burned and laughed and told weed stories. One of my best weed moments ever. When we went back to our living quarters we ate everything in sight and watched football. People were saying hey, what are you guys laughing at?
I stayed totally sober for a year after that. I never did a line of anything ever again and i drink very moderately. Weed has always been my drug if choice. The education i received in that rehab saved the quality of my life. Today, i'll be 50 this year, i am a very successful world-traveled fashion model and photographer. I'm financially, emotuonally and spirutually stable. I'm currently in China on a work contract. I smoke twice a day, once with my morning coffee and once in the evening, ok maybe twice in the evening -- every day!  Timmy


"I was working in Silicon Valley during the dot com boom. The early dot com companies were making huge amounts of cash and having extravagant parties for their employees. I was invited to an event in SF that was featuring Sheila E ( Sheia E is Pete Escovedo's daughter, check on Google). She performs salsa music. Before my friends picked me up, I decided to smoke 1/2 a joint. I had a nice buzz. We walked into this rather large venue with all the people up against the wall listening to Sheila E, but no one was dancing. Being Latino, I know how to dance and couldn't believe no one was on the dance floor! After scanning the room for the prettiest girl, I got her on to the dance floor and we started to dance salsa. I led her all over the huge dance floor and the spotlight shined on us. Sheila E saw us and asked that we come on stage and dance. We danced and then all of a sudden the dance floor became packed! As my dance partner and I descended from the stage, girls starting grabbing me to dance with them, and all the men were grabbing my dance partner. I remember dancing, dancing and stopping for a cocktail, and dancing and dancing. Another act was on after Sheila E's performance. By that time I was ready to go home. As I made my way out to wait for my friends, Sheila E was standing outside waiting for her limo. When she saw me she said in Spanish, "Boy, you know how to dance!""


"in the 80's i drove a cab in san diego and after 7 years i got the best fare, san diego to los angeles AND back. the deal was $200. flat fare. on the way up my passenger started his life story. by the time we reached l.a. he had completed only 6 years. having heard pretty much most stories, this one just droned on til i couldnt take it. stuck in los angeles traffic [ 5 mph] i asked my passenger to ask another car for a joint. i chose the car and he asked. the first two were out but apologetic and the third car passed the weed. my passenger paid $10. and the other driver apologised for not having change!! gliding back to san diego was a joy and the passenger gave me a $100. tip. where else could you score on the freeway and make money?!"


"A couple of years after getting caught by my grandmother, we went down Myrtle Beach for my sister's wedding. The whole family was coming but it was only me, my boyfriend, dad, mom, step-dad, grandma, sister, and her future ex husband there the first night (none of the smokers there yet.) Since my boyfriend and I were sharing a room with my dad, we figured we'd go walk on the beach and smoke a joint somewhere. Well, we ended up sitting down front of the dunes facing the ocean and away from the walkers. So anywho......we get finished smoking and walk back up the path to the hotel and find my grandma and step dad sitting outside by some tables they had. All of a sudden my step dad said he got a whiff of some weed. Then he and my grandma proceed to tell us someone was really going at it because they were smelling it really good before we got there. Apparently, we had decided to smoke our joints down wind on the beach in front of them not realizing. Whoops."


"My cousin used to live with my grandmother and stayed down in the basement. That was also where we would hide out and smoke even though we had a feeling she knew what we were doing, we didn't want to get caught. So on the last night our family was in town, some friends were over along with my boyfriend and my cousin's girlfriend. The family was leaving so we said our good-byes and we all proceeded to go downstairs and hang out and do whatever while grandma walked them out and said bye and what not. So we're downstairs talking, laughing, hanging out while my cousin is rolling up the blunt.

 The way the basement is set up, the doors to the outside are french doors. When you open them, there was a couch longways in front but set back a few or two from infront of the door so if you walked in you could see the front of it. To the right against the wall was a love seat. Across from the doors/love seat wall was another couch with the wall to the right of the love seat having the fire place/tv stand etc. My cousin(the roller) was sitting on the couch directly facing the door, my boyfriend and I were sitting on the love seat and the others were on the other couch. So back to us talking, laughing etc. All of a sudden in mid roll the door slams open with grandma barging in. She yells "AHA! I knew I would catch ya! Ya'll didn't think I knew what you were doing but I did and now I caught ya." 
The only thing I could do was stare towards the tv. I would glance at my cousin and all I remember him doing is sitting there holding the paper, looking down at it shaking his head and kinda laughing (not at grandma, more in shock/dis-belief.) Apparently after saying good-bye grandma decided to take the trash out which was by the basement doors. The next thing I know grandma slams the door and walks back up front. We just sat there for a few minutes in shock, then decided to leave and smoke somewhere else. So that was the time grandma caught us almost smoking. My most memorable experience getting high even though I wasn't actually high yet. Funny thing is she doesn't care whether we do it now or not.


"Ah yes, one of my most memorable experiences being baked was during a warm summer night in Northern Utah. I was with a good friend named 'K' and it was 2011. He always picked me up in his small car around midnight so we could roll ridiculously fat blunts and park in this very secluded street that had a great view of the tall mountains and the night sky. In my opinion, we have always gotten very high-grade Mary Jane since we source from many different people, but by no means were we lightweights. K and I always liked to listening to nineties hip-hop and we were so enthralled, we would record ourselves freestyle rapping in his car, on this dark street for hours upon end. 

One night, in the middle of our freestyle session, we couldn't help but notice an odd floating light above the mountain. It was a faint light, yet moved with agility in various directions. Since the blunt was already smoked, we decided to turn into detectives and chase the origin of the light. Considering we lived close to a canyon, it wasn't far for us to end up on the other side of the mountain where you see the night sky more vividly. We start cruising and before you know it, we are through the canyon and taking an exit that leads closer to this mysterious glowing object in the sky. Before you know it, we lose sight of the object and laugh that we had came all this way on a hunch that it might be an E.T. 
Let me remind you, it is probably around 2am and there is absolutely no cars out except for the random highway semi trucks here and there. As we are driving down this frontage road near the highway, we see a train of cars coming toward us, which appears very odd since they are one after the other, virtually bumper to bumper traveling about 40 to 50 miles per hour! As I stare in disbelief in the passenger seat, K points out that all the cars are white in color. The train of cars last for almost an entire minute as we pass them traveling in the opposite direction. Furthermore, almost every single white car was a different make and model. Remind you, traveling almost bumper to bumper going over 40 miles per hour!!! K and I have many theories, such as a government dispatch caravan of cars in response to the UFO. We also belive it could have possibly been the UFOs themselves!I know this sounds crazy, but it really happened! To this day we share a hard laugh reminiscing on the events of that summer night. UFO cover up in Northern Utah? Maybe. Unforgettable experience high on mota? Definitely! :)


"A few years ago me and two buddies were on our way to pick up some snacks to feed our immense hunger. We had all smoked before we left and drove about a mile down the road to get our provisions. On our way back the driver realized that his left signal light had gone out. We were in a town known to pick on people our age and arrest anybody with any trace amount of marijuana. So, in a moderate THC induced paranoia we only took right turns until we got home, we ended up driving all over town just so my friend wouldn't have to use his left blinker and potentially give a cop any reason to pull us over. To this day we laugh about this story and I get asked to retell it all the time. We sometimes refer to that friend as Zoolander now, "I can't turn left!""


"One night my sister Courtney and I were driving around. 3 blunts in and my sister looks at me and is talking. I put my hand up and say "Shhh I can't even hear English right now!""


"I have smoked a joint on ALCATRAZ ISLAND! Our 4:30 tour boat Jan 2000 landed at the dock. My wife and  I proceeded to take the walking tour. I usually have a joint in my sock just in case the opportunity comes along.  Being Jan, the sun was gone early so darkness was abounding and with the backdrop of the city of SAN FRANCISCO and the wind blowing perfectly away from anyone, I almost forgot to EXHALE realizing I was on THE ROCK!  I just smiled at life."

"It was my second year in college, and i could say I'm not like some other girls who's into studying and some other girly stuffs. I usually be seen in arcades playing video games and playing basketball, makes me one of the boys, that makes me also near and prone to vices. I was taking nursing when i tried to smoke weed. I was in the arcade when i bumped into a friend (Tangkad) who introduced me to his friend Dan. They were singing in a sing-along cubicle that time so i was able hear them sing and had a crush on Dan, now my husband.

 I still remember as fresh at that moment when i heard him sing "no woman no cry" by Bob Marley, and he really sung it well.They were smoking while having a good time, it was illegal of course so they were hiding the stuff while doing the thing. I never tried any drugs, i don't even drink alcohol, but when Dan ask me to try weed, i dont know but i had to say yes and so i did, and i felt nothing on my first time so i had to do it again. I see Dan like everyday, we dont talk much but i could say we're getting closer as friends. 
As the days went by i was able to meet all his friends, and smoke with them. Our spots are mostly in public places like Luneta Park were we could see a variety of people doing stuff, dating, skating, selling, and we're there to smoke. We also smoke in a cemetery "Paco Park" is what they call it, a cemetery for infants and where our national hero was buried after his execution "Dr. Jose Rizal". Just our luck that we never got caught. I was the only girl in their group. They let me try all things how to smoke weed from pipe to joints to bong to shotgun to water pipe. Everything was fun, and i will never forget the first time i got high when i first tried shotgun. I dont know if that's what others call it, but it was in our place. It's where someone will smoke first and blow it out of his mouth passing it to you while you suck the smoke through your mouth and off course hold it, and that's how i got my first high experience. My first high experience made me eat every street food stop on my way home. It became our daily routine that they bring me to my boarding house after our school. It was only a 10 min walk on the way home, but i dont understand why it took us like almost 5 hours walking, but we're not tired, laughing while walking. I still remember, when i just saw a piece of trash and laugh on it for no reason. And dont know how did i ate like 3 kilos of kalamares (squid in flour deep fried) i know i was full, i can feel my uniform getting tight on my stomach area and still i want to eat.


"back in those days I was called bob the butcher, it was the mid seventies and I worked as a butcher (yes I got high and no I didn't cut my fingers off). my father had a grocery store in san francisco on ocean avenue and my sister and I bought in as partners. the store was halfway between state college and city college, so we had quite the diverse clientel. 

one night it was my grandparents' 50th wedding anniversary and my father and sister left early from work to get to the party in marin and I closed the store and was to change and get there fast. alas as it happens I went to a friend's place to change and smoked with him and got totally wasted,toasted is an understatement. getting dressed I found that I grabbed my dad's shirt instead of mine and had to cut the sleeves off for it to fit, figured no one would notice with the suit jacket on over it. well I made it across the golden gate and walked into the restaurant expecting a small family only but formal dinner with no idea how late I was. it didn't matter I was smiles from ear to ear. the hostess led me to a door to a private room and when I enter somebody yelled there's bobby and the whole room clapped and cheered. stunned surprised and completely embarrassed I was beet red in the face but couldn't stop smiling as my father yelled out "sit down before you fall down" and my sister's boyfriend yelled "close your eyes before you bleed to death". all eyes were on me or it sure felt that way as I got to my seat to find my soup ,salad,dinner and desert all before me because everyone else was done and having coffee. i was placed next to some guy that was my neighbor when I was 6 and another guy that was just as obscure..the party couldn't be done fast enough and I heard about it and was the brunt of much ribbing for months.BUTdespite all the embarrassment, it was a great night and a wonderful high with lots of laughs and my grandparents were never the wiser.


"I lived with my brother and a few other roommates in a trailer in what is called 'The Heights" in Montana. My brother is now what you would call a connoisseur of marijuana, but he would regularly get different kinds of strains from his buddy "ninja"....he owned a Ninja motorcycle...hence the name....any way, one night he comes home with this strain called we all sat down and proceeded to partake in the circle. Much like the circle in the show "That 70's Show", we would go around and make up stupid shit, whatever, cut up and laugh. 

As the night progressed and the bowls progressed, I decided that it was time to make something to munch on. I was known at that time as 'Betty Crocker of Ghetto Gourmet" and started cleaning the fridge out to make some sort of stoney, yummy concoction. My best friend Steph and my brother had some sort of inside joke with the old lady in the Wendy's commercial and her line, where's the beef....and by the way my best friend at the ripe age of 30 had full upper dentures. So as I am making this buffet of things thrown together, I overhear her and my brother talking about something, when I hear him say in a booming voice "YOU HAVE TO DO IT! YOU HAVE TO" My other roomie Bill was in the living room with them, just starting to crack up....I didn't pay much attention until she came up to me in the kitchen, while I am trying to be Chef Ghetto, takes her dentures out and comes within an inch of my face and says..."Where's da beef", the only thing I remember after that was the oven door laying on top of my legs and I was dying in hysterics on the floor. I looked over to see where she was, and Daniel, my brother, was laughing so hard all he could do was crawl on his hands and knees away from the scene, my bestie was in the corner, as she had slid down the wall, was holding her cheeks on her face rocking, back and forth laughing her fool head off. The other room mate Bill had completely collapsed onto the floor gasping for air.....needless to say, after that event, I am no longer allowed to have that strain in fear I will destroy another oven door. But the great thing is, that story is one of the most talked about story to this day....and to this day, I still have not smoked diesel again.


"I am a makeup artist for film and television. A few years ago I worked on a tv series with Dennis Hopper. He was a true artist in every since of the word. He also liked to unwind at the end of the day by smoking a joint. We bonded instantly over our shared love of marijuana. One night he invited me to share a joint with him. The whole time I thought I AM SMOKING WITH THE EASY RIDER! I even called my Mom afterwards to brag :) We smoked together many times after that but the first time is the most memorable. I am sad he is gone now but I will never forget our smoke sessions where we would just talk about life. This man lived without regrets and lived life to its fullest seeing beauty and art in everything. Truly unforgettable."


"It was my junior year in high school. It was the end of the 80s and I'd been smoking weed for a couple of years. The stuff we got was always good for the giggle/munchie high. The wonderful, mind expanding, life enhancing high. Where you lay outside with your friends at night and look at the stars and ponder your insignifigance against such eternal forces. Or you go to the mall, smoke a joint on the way home and make brownie batter when you get there because, well, because it's the most incredible food ever made. Period.

One particular early summer day, in the heyday of the waterbed, my two friends and I were smoking in her bedroom. It was a great day. Sun was shining. Not too hot. We had some cranking tunes on the stereo and we were alternately mellow and giggly. We were smoking out of a pipe and we had settled into our smoker's triangle on the waterbed. Puff, puff, pass... As we got stoned we all settled back into the corners of the waterbed to groove on the music and enjoy the high. Well, I had settled in a little further to my corner than the other two. And if you've been in a waterbed, some of you know how the corners will let your butt fall all the way in and then trap you there? Yeah. I was grooving in the waterbed corner pocket.
Pretty soon the pipe came my way again. I was giggling at some thing. It never really matters what it is, does it? Just that you're happy about it. I took the pipe, put it between my lips, lit the lighter,and promptly exhaled instead of inhaled. The entire bowl flew all over the bed. The looks of stoned horror on my friend's faces was simply too much. I snort-laughed while Kelly yelled, "Dammit Kim"! "Just sit in your corner and be fucking stoned"! This was quite possibly the funniest thing I'd ever heard in my life and I dissolved into hysterical laughter all the while trying to pick up the tiny pieces of weed to reload the bowl. At this point the other two lost it and the three of us sat on that damn waterbed, sloshing around, trying to pick up the lost weed, howling like lunatics. Meanwhile, not a foot away from me sat the bag of buds. When the waterbed had finally beaten us into submission and we could catch our breath, we all three looked at the bag at the same time. More laughter ensued, but by now, we were all hungry and bruised from fighting the bed for tiny flecks of green. Downstairs for brownie batter. God damn that stuff is heaven when you're high.To this day, whenever I annoy Kelly or am just too excited, she'll tell me to sit in my corner and be stoned. Best day ever!


"Eternal420 Redwood City CAIt was the summer of 07 or 08 I don't really remember the time but I was in high school and my brother had invited me to a party. But this just wasn't any party this was Joe's party. Joe's place was the place to party. From hot girls to beer pong, hookah and of course Jamaican showers. Now I had know about this part in day in advance so I talked to my dealer at the time and asked for some special stuff. I figured I should bring bring some A grade tree to party out of respect. My dealer coincidently had some new stuff called Romulan. I was given sample to try it out at my own convenience. After taking a big hit in my pipe I was over whelmed. I clearly underestimated this strain's strength. I got back to my dealer and asked for a quarter ounce. So before the party started me and my brother had a little session. Then we got to the party where my brother had a few drinks I had one (I'm not much of drinker) then we had the Jamaican shower and then a few blunts. By this time people are either leaving or passing out. My brother and I start smoking hookah when our good friend begins to puke from lack of holding his liquor. When my brother comes up with a great idea. Let's mix some weed and hookah together. Now weren't exactly told it was ok to do that because this was outside and there was a tarp covering us and the weed smell would stay in the tarp till morning when Joe's parents would be coming back. But none the less we did it anyway. If I recall correctly there was a contest going on between us on who could out smoke who. After a long session it got to a draw. I honestly don't remember much after that but at some point we ate these shark gummy worm candies. The next morning I wake up on the floor in a sleeping bag with my mouth halfway open and half eaten shark gummy worm candy in my mouth and a really big headache. Lucky I managed to take some pictures of the party which I don't remember taking LOL. In the end it was totally worth it. And I would do it again given the chance."

"Eternal420 Redwood City CA. It was the summer of 07 or 08 I don't really remember the time but I was in high school and my brother had invited me to a party. But this just wasn't any party this was Joe's party. Joe's place was the place to party. From hot girls to beer pong, hookah and of course Jamaican showers. 

Now I had known about this party a day in advance so I talked to my dealer at the time and asked for some special stuff. I figured I should bring bring some A grade tree to party out of respect. My dealer coincidently had some new stuff called Romulan. I was given sample to try it out at my own convenience. After taking a big hit in my pipe I was over whelmed. I clearly underestimated this strain's strength. I got back to my dealer and asked for a quarter ounce. So before the party started me and my brother had a little session. Then we got to the party where my brother had a few drinks. I had one (I'm not much of drinker) then we had the Jamaican shower and then a few blunts. 
By this time people are either leaving or passing out. My brother and I start smoking hookah when our good friend begins to puke from lack of holding his liquor. When my brother comes up with a great idea. Let's mix some weed and hookah together. Now  we weren't exactly told it was ok to do that because this was outside and there was a tarp covering us and the weed smell would stay in the tarp till morning when Joe's parents would be coming back. But none the less we did it anyway. If I recall correctly there was a contest going on between us on who could out smoke who. After a long session it got to a draw. I honestly don't remember much after that but at some point we ate these shark gummy worm candies. The next morning I wake up on the floor in a sleeping bag with my mouth halfway open and half eaten shark gummy worm candy in my mouth and a really big headache. Lucky I managed to take some pictures of the party which I don't remember taking LOL. In the end it was totally worth it. And I would do it again given the chance.


"I was by myself, in my parents' basement, listening to the title cut of the LP album “East-West” by the Butterfield Blues Band. If anyone not “of the sixties” wants one song to know what was going on at the time, this one is it. (Wow…why don't I listen to it on youtube now as I write this! Contact high time…no weed in the house at this time….) I had a great stereo in 1966. Big speaker cabinets I’d made myself with some great ElectroVoice SP-12B speakers, and a DynaKit amp. I knew the song, but this time I’d scored some very good weed and was in another dimension. The piece is 13 minutes long, and is like an Indian Raga, with one rif being expanded to heaven, then it stops, and a new path taken. That path leads to a crescendo again, and it stops, and changes into something new, which progresses, intensifies, climaxes, a brief silence, then another progression.

Uh-oh, have to hurry, the song is half way thru. Cresendo just a minute away, but I know everyday for 49 years what I learned then, which has been a thought turned into a life lesson of how to deal with desire, the hardest thing for a human to tone down….ask any Buddhist. As the energy of the song progresses onward toward the build up to climax, I am right there with it. Eyes closed, running, flying, supersonic, all energy, calm, knowing exactly where I am….going to heaven, or Nirvana, or Samadi….that kind of place. 
But do I really want to go there? Then what? Isn’t the journey itself enough, or even “better.”? Especially if there is another journey just waiting after a little silence? Thank you, Paul Butterfield and Michael Bloomfield, both RIP, and of course the rest of the band. You changed the way I deal with it when I’m in desire and what to “do” about it. Of course I slip up, but after some voluntary or otherwise time out, I return to the song,,,,it’s part of me….DoctoriknowKoh Samui, Thailand [Administrator listened to "East/West" while reading this. Thanks, been a long time!]

"My most memorable high occurred at an old school concert in downtown Cincinnati Ohio my junior year (79') of high school. Part of what made this particular incident memorable was the fact that i went down there by myself (i had just moved to Cincy due to my mom getting remarried) and was relegated to scrapping together some crumbs for my show smoke. 

Whether by chance or seat number on my ticket ( not sure which) i ended up sitting all the way up top, last row. Shortly after the show started, i noticed a few guy's to my left who where smoking some pretty good smelling bud and luckily it was headed my way! Sure enough i was put in rotation and shortly thereafter completely stoned. Not sure what was rolled up (i think the guy mentioned something about joints being dipped in hash oil) but it goes down in my book as the most powerful high i have ever experienced, therefore my most memorable.


"From Deric in So Cal. I was lying on the couch smoking a j and watching Hitchcock's The Birds at my uncle's pad in LA. 1968. When the movie got to where the bird's were attacking the kids and school teacher it was like freak out time, like I was there being attacked too. Amazing."


"rocknancy here...Ashland OH. in a small town in the midwest and been a pot smoker at this point in time for about 2 years. I knew my folks had a clue I was getting high (could have been the big pot plant poster in my bedroom?). They got the bright idea to send me to San Francisco to see my cousin, who was 8 years older than me and her husband. Flew there that fall and turns out they both were BIG pot smokers....imagine that! The first night, friends of theirs came and my cousin went to the kitchen and took down a large coffee can just filled with bud. The 5 of us sat in the their living room and smoked and smoked. All of a sudden it hit me that I was in over my head. This was some unreal smoke and I realized that what I had been smoking in Ohio was not skunkweed but a step above it. 

The next hour or so I spent glued to the couch unable to speak or even move my arms...the 4 of them must have thought I was just really shy or awkward. After that I knew I was truly experienced. My cousin and I still laugh about that night all these years later. Oh and when I got off the plane going home in my micro mini skirt, big floppy hat and fur coat, my parents knew they had made a bad decision sending me to San Francisco!


"I was in high school 1965, We were getting a burger and people-watching from our car at the drive in. Around us were a few of the in crowd standing outside their cars drinking the trendy Coor's beer showing off the label on their can. We rolled a number and lit it up. Well it wasn't long before those guys got a whiff and then...they stared at us in shock. I loved it! Us nobodys at school blew them away. Reefer was absolutely new to our community and we were the first. Deric southern Minnesota."


"High in Barcelona

I was walking along Los Ramblas near La Segrada Familia by Gaudi when I saw two young hipsters. I smiled.One said, “Hey are you English?” “No. American,” I said. "Do you get high?” I thought for a second and said “Yes.”Follow us.”I
So I followed these two young men, Ian and Marc. Ian was from South Africa, his parents ran a factory but sold it and traveled with their son around the world. They wrote several stories that were published about their travels. Ian said he was working, but didn’t elaborate. They went to a square just off Las Ramblas, where they met several expatriates, most of them from England but a couple of them from the United States. One ex-pat living here was an English teacher. He thought Americans were so stupid driving their big gas guzzling cars and trucks and eating McDonald’s and watching late night TV advertisements where pitchman sell knives, vacuum cleaners and buying real estate with no money down. “Stupid people fall for these schemes, buy our windshield wiper, it cleans better than anything on the market. Just pay two installments of $29.95,” the English teacher said. I laughed. 
We hung out here for a couple of hours, then I stood up and announced, “Hey it’s going to be my birthday in 5 minutes. I will be 27.” “That’s fantastic,” Ian said. He rolled a joint with tobacco and hash, he put so much hash in it that some of it fell on the floor. He lit the spleef and passed it around the table. The spleef tasted good and sweet with the golden colored honey hash. They drank mugs of beers and sang happy birthday to me.
 This was the best birthday party, their gift to me was their company and several spleefs. I was bursting with love of humanity and comradeship, I was 2,000 miles from home and I was free to be me. We stayed out all night. At one point, Ian and I walked by a huge castle that was lighted for security reasons. We ended on the beach, watching Bulldozers like Monsters moving the sand on the beach for the next day’s tourists. Ian played his guitar to the sounds of the waves. I tried to sleep, feeling so tired and stoned. The lights of the Monster Movers with Big White Light Eyes Crawled on the Beach. I was tripped out and suddenly alone. Ian was gone. I was lying under a table in the sand. 
At 5 a.m. Ian and I went to ghastly pink bar and ordered coffee. Sitting there, drinking coffee, feeling the pink pornographic cloud of desolation over the horizon, catatonic exhaustion, I lay down on a park bench near the beach. Sleeping on a park bench can be terrifying, you don’t know who or when someone is going to approach and try to rob you. The fear of attack kept me slightly awake, but mostly I felt I was a in surreal time period without end.
 I woke to the bright light of the morning sun. I found I was sitting near a man who introduced himself as Michael of Liberia. He was big and black and beautiful. I was struck by the light on his face. I sipped his water bottle, lighted a cigarette and felt myself glad to be talking to someone in English. The people of Liberia speak English, the country was settled by Americans who were repatriating slaves to Africa. I rolled a spleef. It was early in the morning to be smoking hash, but I saw an opportunity to connect with this man from Africa. I lighted the joint and passed it to Michael, who took several long drags on the joint.“This is sweet, it reminds me of the smoke in my home country,” Michael said. “I used to walk into the fields of green and smoke and eat. There was so much growing right there. I never had to go far to find something to eat or smoke. Nature provides.”


"I have thought this one through. I believe my most memorable moment was when my dad popped by to see me after having a few drinks. I had already gotten high with my girlfriend while we were making 'magic brownies'. My dad had a sweet tooth, always was making him cookies, pies, etc. 

He came in and visited a few minutes before he said, 'I'll take one of those brownies you made.' I was,  I don't know, scared, but started to giggle. I gave him one, then another, he says 'these are really good, mind if I have another?' By this time I had to tell him that they were mary janes, he was pretty tipsy from drinking so I said okay, but you will have to spend the night, I can't let you drive home. Well many years later, I found out that he had been smoking for quite some time! 
And we never spoke of that night until a couple of years later when a bad March storm blew out my bedroom window, I went to my Dad's for the night, by the time I got there I was a nervous wreck, he asked me if I was okay, and I said 'yes, but I could use a joint right now.' He went to his bedroom and came out with a bag! I was kinda shocked but thanked him. He has since passed from cancer at an early age, 58. Love you Dad! from Daddy's little girl. Hamlin, NY


"So around 1982 I was working as a prep cook in a restaurant in Georgetown, DC, and one of my fellow cooks was a hilarious gal named Gwendolyn, whose nephew worked there as a line cook. Gwen was always going on about how she couldn't wait to go home and smoke her 'lovely'. I was no slouch in the weed smoking dept. so I figured I could handle a bit at work, even though I had never been high at a job before. So we snuck out back and I took a tiny puff and sauntered back in. I had to complete the soup and desserts I was making using industrial equipment. Fortunately I have blocked out a lot of the details, but I retain a clear memory of standing motionless holding a huge knife and just staring. I not only didn't get what I was supposed to do next, I basically didn't understand what soup was. I never smoked at work again!                                 Selma Portland OR"


"Summer 1967, Beirut, Lebanon. I left NYC in March of 66' - my quest was to smoke reb leb. In my opinion, and at 22 I had a shit load of those, Lebanese Red, was the best hashish in the world. What a cool adventure it would be to go directly to the source and smoke that shit right where it grew out of the Great Mother Earth. I figured it would be legal, cheap and fresh, surely a winning combo by any standards. 

I arrived on the 1st day of June, 1967 just as the sun was setting. It turned the city an incredible golden color. The place looked amazing. I was psyched, i had finally arrived, took me fifteen months so although the airport was in chaos due to a cholera scare, I heard that shit can kill ya, and so accepted the vaccination if only to get them to give me bags. 
It took a few days to find out it was so easy to score. Why? Because hashish was illegal! They didn't even sell cigarette papers. Yeah, they had hash alright, but it was an export crop, grown only to be sold to the Egyptians, so they told me. I mean I smoked that shit in NYC and I'm not Egyptian. Besides, I had traveled half way round the world to get high, and I was not about to split without smoking some serious dope! 
The War. It began five days after I arrived. I was instructed by the American Embassy to evacuate. They told me to bring a blanket and 24 hours worth of food. Where are we going? Sorry we can't tell you. I hung up, and realized I didn't have a blanket, and if I was gonna die, well I hoped it would be smoking some of that wicked reb leb. Pretty soon I was the only American chick left in town. 
Our Six Day War lasted three weeks. One moing while sitting in a cafe, I met a young man and as we got talking I told him I was looking for two things, where I could score some hash, and where I ccould find a job. He took me to a bar, located near the beach, called The Emperor Club. It looked inviting enough, with lush vines covering a small terrace. The doors were opened and a man in a white shirt sat at a table. Introductions were made. I understood zero Arabic and he only spoke only a few words of English. And when he said to me, I like you, sit down here nice. I did. 
I sat there while they talked, and understood only one word, hashish. Then the boss got up and came back with a small hookah and a big grin. You like hashish? he asked. I smiled. I love hashish. We got stoned. It was my first and last job interview conducted with a hookah. Sharon, Amsterdam, Netherlands

"I was on a trip to Hawaii with my very cool grandmother. I had baked some weed into cookies - and told my grandmother about it! She had smoked a couple times in her life and was curious. So one day we got in to the rental car - a convertible - and started driving down the coast of Maui. I had given her a tiny coer of a cookie. I had a little nibble too. 

As we're driving the sun is setting, and I've got Thievery Corporation on the stereo. My grandmother, who has never liked ANY electronic music, turns to me and goes: "This music is soooooooo good!" I cracked up. Pretty soon she's telling me "I get it, I really get it! I know why everyone likes marijuana!" It wasn't long before she was asking for some water, and then more or less fell asleep. 
One of my favorite stories to tell! Jeb, Sag Harbor

"In the late 70s I visited my friend Donna in India. We were both in our late 20s. She was working there as a fashion designer and had a little house with a staff of servants. Not posh, but decidedly a step up from the lowly digs she had left behind in Manhattan. I roamed around Delhi during the day while she worked, and in the evenings we literally hung out with royalty. In particular, an actual decadent Prince who treated us to midnight jeep trips into his farmland, peopled by peasants living under trees at the edges of the fields. He would rouse them from their sleep to build bonfires, once even commanding them to set up speakers in all four corners of his field so we could listen to Herbie Hancock and smoke his royal, above-the-law weed under the stars. To this day, it's the most exotic and truly shameful thing I've ever experienced. Yvonne, Santa Fe "

"Wake n Bake! Towards the end of my senior year of high school, in the spring of 1981, I answered a bulletin board notice for a warehouse job. The company was called Global Woolen Corporation, and it was located in a decidedly iffy area of Stamford. It paid $3.85 an hour, which back in those days was about fifty cents above the minimum wage. 

Around the first day on the job, I met a kid named Keith. He lived about a mile from my house. Keith was only a year younger than me, but we hadn't gone to high school together. Instead, he was attending some posh private academy somewhere up in northern New England. He suggested that we car pool together. The next day, he picked me up. I remember riding in a red convertible, the rag top down. He insisted that we get high. At first, I objected. I had only smoked weed once before, and that was only days ago. I thought it was something you only did at night. To smoke weed at eight in the moing seemed scandalous. He insisted, and I gave in. 
Next thing I know, we are cruising down the Connecticut Tupike, passing a pipe back and forth. Around noon, Keith asked me out for lunch. We got high a second time. It was in a certain way a godsend. I hated the job, and I could tell from day one that I was ill suited for it. I remember guys yelling at me all the time, but now, I could care less. I was in my own little stoned world.
Five o'clock came. It was quitting time. Keith and I got high for a third and final time. By the time I got home, I was completely wasted. I remember being silent at dinner with my parents, trying hard not to give myself away, all the while wolfing down my food in a way I had never done before. I lasted three weeks at that job. Finally, my boss called me in, saying that they were laying me off, because they had hired too many people. I had a feeling it really had to do with my job performance, but I didn't pry. He ended up doing me a favor, as I soon found another job that paid a whopping four bucks an hour. Alas, it didn't include a coworker like Keith! Thor, Mamaroneck, NY

"There are some things in life that point out, more than most, how much things have changed. This, I think, would be one of them. Back in Aug. of 1983,flying out to San Francisco from NYC, (or perhaps back from it, who remembers now?), Greg and I, non-cigarette smokers, were seated in the non-smoking section. (This, of course, was when such differentiations were made.) It was a large plane and it wasn't full. There were some empty seats in the smoking section and at some point, we decided to avail ourselves of them and smoked pot from Greg's pipe. It sounds unbelievably wild (and unbelievably stupid) now, but as we weren't really "rebels"; it didn't seem quite so outrageous then. (It's also quite possible we weren't the only ones doing it.) Anyway, we got away with it. We were flying high indeed in those friendly skies. Greta, Santa Rosa, CA"

"It was a great idea. One of our best, really. Walter's Hot Dogs (yes, the famous Walter's Hot Dogs if you are an East Coast hot dog aficionado) was celebrating its 75th anniversary with a hot dog eating contest and we would enter it. Totally baked, of course. 

It was our senior year of high school and I'm guessing we were similar to most high school potheads in many regards. My friends had started smoking before I had, which meant that by the time I joined them they were smoking every day, and multiple times most days. It was the late 90s but we still listened to the Doors, Led Zeppelin, and Pink Floyd and we grew our hair long. Most of all, tho, we cracked each other up. We had a number of favorite smoking spots around town, particularly near the high school, which happened to be located across the street from Walter's. One of those spots was down near the train tracks, in an area with slightly ominous. Signs warned of the presence of the compound beryllium. The spot was nicknamed Beryllium Flats or sometimes just Berylliums. We emerged from Berylliums one day with the customary munchies and went to Walters for amazing hot dogs (split down the middle and griddled on both sides), curly fries, and extra thick cowboy shakes.That's when we saw the sign advertising the anniversary and contest. 
The rules were simple: eat as many hot dogs as you could (bun included) in ten minutes. But there were two magic words that made it a sure thing for us: Free entry. We signed up, guffawing throughout the process. A week later and the day of the contest was upon us. Immediately after school, we had raced back to my house, also conveniently located near the high school. The exact means of our smoking escapes me now (surprise, surprise) but I'm pretty sure we had at least two things going at once, maybe a joint and a bong, or perhaps a joint and this funny gold plated metal hookah one of us had brought back from a student exchange trip to Europe. 
We got very, very, very stoned and rushed back towards Walters, because, of course, by this time we were running late. Along for the ride was my older brother who we had seen at the house and who knew a good spectacle when he saw one coming. As soon as we arrived at Walter's, we realized that we had completely underestimated the size and nature of the event. There was a stage. There were bleachers for the audience. There was an announcer and a p.a. There were t.v. news crews. I think we let out a collective Whoa. After checking in at the registration desk, we heard the announcer over the p.a.:Wait folks, what's this? A few dark horse entries! Alright, gentlemen, please take your seats on the stage. 
Dark horses indeed. We exchanged slightly panicked looks, tho we were also on the verge of laughter at the hilarity of the situation, and took our seats. A Walter's employee approached me with two questions: Ketchup or mustard? And Beverage choice? I went with ketchup and water.The announcer asked the crowd for some applause before the countdown,and boxes of hot dogs were set down in front of each of us along with our beverages. And all of a sudden we heard Three,two,one! Dig in! The next ten minutes are bit of a blur. I remember that to my left was a pretty huge young man who had an actual strategy. He would inhale the hot dog itself without the bun and then, grosser than gross, dip the bun in his cup of water to make it go down easier. I, of course, had no strategy other than to try and keep a straight face and make it ten minutes without fleeing the scene. Also, I definitely knew that I wanted to avoid the t.v. cameras after the contest. 
In the end, the fat kid was right. The buns are what get you. I think I made it through four and half hot dogs before the buzzer sounded. Which meant that I beat out only two other competitors (both of them dark horse friends of mine). Although the fat kid had a good strategy, he was beat by a tiny Asian-American man from New Jersey, who was actually famous on the competitive food-eating circuit.
My friends and I collected our honorary prizes (Walter's Hot Dogs 75th Anniversary commemorative t-shirts, which we sported with a mix of pride and irony for the next five years) and went back to Berylliums, to get stoned again, of course. Larry, Alameda CA